Monday, September 24, 2012

Talk to Me

"I want to talk to [Yah], but I'm afraid because we ain't spoke in so long."

There is only one I need and he is the only who I can talk to, but I get discouraged. I think impossible feats. I've wonder if he hates me. I've wondered if we really knew each other. Now all those ponderings seem so silly.

He gives you what you need. And when you ask and listen he'll tell you what you need to hear.

My only regret is that I don't talk to him more. My only regret is that I don't pray more. I worry so much about things that don't matter--things that were never in to be out. I'll admit it. I admit it. I am so flawed. These aren't excuses because there could never be a worthy excuse. These are just facts. In the end--as if there was one--He knows how I feel about him. Even when I doubt, my doubts aren't real.

The only thing that's ever been real is Yahweh. Call him what you want but I'll call him Dad. I know there is no greater love and I'm grateful to be a recipient. I'm making a lot of mistakes and I hope they lead me to better things because only He has the power to do that and I know its possible. I want to hear His voice.

Wednesday, September 12, 2012

The Thing About Yahweh Is...

One can never be certain of what's in His plan and what He's going to do next. No matter what you think is right, if he deems it wrong, that is what it is. And when you do wrong, you're condemned. Not matter which way you slice it. Yahweh doesn't play games. He brought someone into my life a few weeks ago. This guy has become an over night celebrity. Like so many before him, I am uncertain. I've made a lot of mistakes in my life. I made the aware. I have loved in vain. Now, it seems like I have met a person who gets me and I feel like I have no love to give. It sucks. But time heals all. I hope my boyfriend is as amazing as I think he is. And I hope can live up to the woman he needs me to be. In the end, it's all up to Yahweh and it'a all about Yahweh. I just hope I'm in His plan.