I've Voided Your Excuse/ You Can Save Your Song And Dance...

You see, my little cousin "Nikki" had something when she started that 0 tolerance policy last year. No shit from any nigga! Well, I am going to start applying this policy to my life. I have to tell you, it's hard not to go back to a begging man after you've been dealing with him for years. But, as I said before I am sick of being that on again off again girl. There is going to be nothing different about THIS time! His apologies are still the same. There is a point when second and third and fourth and fifth chances just become stupidity. In the infamous words my girl Nikeya Wade spoke to our manager Matt, "I won't allow myself to become any man's flunky."

I am at the point in my life where I am done dreaming and ready to take some actions. I have nothing to lose and a whole lot to gain. If I got up and left Columbus tomorrow I wouldn't be leaving much behind. Really OHIO as a whole. If I left Ohio tomorrow the only this I would be leaving behind is an unfinished degree and my family. Now, yes- those are two very important things in my life that I am not ready to let go of just yet- but a year from now? A year from now I will have completed my undergraduate studies. A year from now will be the same as today concerning my family, because I know no matter where life leads me- they are always in my heart and they are always backing me 100%! So, there it is.

Right now I am on my grind. I am pinching every penny I have! Saving here- doing me there, lol. I have definitely realized what is important in life. Man, I tell ya- I have ignored so many phone calls in the last two weeks that I may as well disconnect my damned phone. I am sick of hearing niggas' bullshit. I am sick of hearing bitches pretend to be my friends. The whole process is just so exhausting- so why front?... why even answer?

For a while I was so dedicated to trying to secure some college friends. In the world they say these are you real friends, the ones you remember for the rest of your life- but that's not real talk! I am going to leave OSU with the same friend I had when I came here- DERRICK. Of course I am going to have a plethora of experiences and stories- but that's it! I am just so ready to move on. In a way it is comforting to know that the people I needed in my life have been there for the last six years- its just sad to note that I didn't recognize them for who they are!

I came to OSU a young lady and I will leave a WOMAN. There will be many references to my past- but I doubt I will mention many names. I tried being friends with man, I tried finding love through many- I guess I even tried finding myself through many. I now realize that this is part of growing. I will move on never looking over my shoulder wondering WHAT IF? I gave everyone A chance. I asked many for A chance. I tested every relation/friendship and I came out null and VOID. So, I am doing what TWEET sung, I am VOIDING all the excuses that are coming at me! I want everyone who is in my past to STAY in my past!